Passion

Haven't blogged for a while, its not for lack of things to blog about, more like my life suddenly got flooded with events. X_X

Well, firstly, as a lot of people would have noticed, last Wednesday's Straits Times has my photo on the FRONT page. Not by myself, but with my twin sis and a whole bunch of other twins that are also graduating from SP. I'm immensely surprised that they put this on the cover page, but oh well. :D Cheap thrill in life, ahaha. Can tell people that you've been on the cover of the newspaper. For doing nothing!

Ok ok, jokes aside, I'm really privileged to have this honour. It made me think about how, by something that I just happen to have (being born a twin), God is able to use me to glorify Him. Suddenly it's a great talking point and ice-breaker wherever I go. Like Kexin told her boss when she introduced me today, how I'm 'that girl' who appeared on the cover of the newspaper last week. Er heh heh.

Really, if God can use something as basic and simple as this, what great plans does He have for the talents and gifts He has placed in me? It makes me just in awe to think. :) Exciting, ain't it.

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I just recovered from two weeks of fever, sore throat and cough. It came during the week I had to go for Mock CG evaluation! So just DO IT! And thankfully I didn't KO and collapse somewhere in a shivering heap, made it through each day and got some good comments.

I just chionged almost 100 pages of the book for assignment. 400+ to go. I got delayed in my reading, having to take care of so many things. Sigh. Just when I'm recovered, my sister falls sick. And my teammates too. Virus, begone!!!!!

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Recently, there's been alot of thought on my mind about ministry. My cgl got me to share about what keeps me going in the ministry, that breaking point and the defining moments.

Well, in Drama Ministry, it really is a passion. I love God, I love Drama, so marry the two and hey presto! How I even got into DM is another long story. Anyway, that's another story for another day.

When I tell people I'm in Drama Ministry, the first thing they ask me is "What have you acted in?" Then when I tell them I'm in the Backstage crew, they don't know how to react. People usually don't even realise or know that backstage crew exist! It doesn't really bother me, because backstage crew are supposed to be invisible. But sometimes, when you feel so tired serving, negative thoughts might come. Serving so hard in the back, yet no one recognises the hard work, let alone know of your existence. It can be mind-grinding and demoralising at times.

Backstage crew really serve hard; first to reach (always at least one hour before the actors arrive, so we can set up the stage, clean the stage of dangerous objects etc), and last to go home (got to pack up, preset for the next day's show, clean and clear the stage, etc). We dress black from head to toes (a single bit of white or colour, and we have to cover that up with black tape ;) ), got to do a lot of physical hard work, we can't join our cell groups, we can't watch the very performance that we are working so hard to support, and all the glory goes to..

Nah, not the actors. :) To God, always. The difficult times are when I feel so tired, and drained. I miss my cell group, always can't go for cg and can't even see them during services due to rehearsal and shows, can't fellowship either cos I need to help settle the backstage stuff. So what's the defining moment?

When Pastor gives that altar call, and I see all the hundreds, no, thousands, of people that flood the aisles.

When you know that all that sweat, blood, tears, crying out to God for more strength, all the time you spent, all the sleep you lost, all the sacrifices you made..it all comes down to that. The fruit. And I'm always so amazed, how the backstage crew can minister to the people, in our own way, without even being seen! :)

And..contrast that now with what I'm doing: Serving in SOT Choir, and also the main service choir as part of SOT practicuum. ^^ It's totally opposite! From the backstage, where I'm supposed to be invisible and unseen, now I'm thrust to the front stage, where I'm supposed to be vibrant and noticed. Haha! Truthfully, I love it. It's an incredible experience for me. I'll be a bit sad when SOT ends and I won't be in choir anymore. :( Unless..I go and join the main choir ministry? (I think I can hear my DM 'si fu' screaming in protest..bleargh :P) Hehe..I'll leave that to after SOT to decide. Anyway, no production for a while until Christmas, so I'd be rather free ministry-wise. The 'sabbath' period for the DM, before it's the mad power rush again. Whoot.

I'm very blessed to have the best of both worlds. :)

Haha, I must share this too: I had a lot of difficulty deciding which ministry to join last time, because I felt a strong desire in 3 ministries, all of which I really liked. Drama, TV, and Choir. I really prayed really hard about it, for a very long time, and felt so torn inside having to decide on just one. Somehow, I didn't feel compelled to make just one final decision, but it really felt that in some way, I would be able to do all 3. Just had this strong feeling in me, although logically, it'd be impossible. I trusted in God's perfect timing and guidance IMMENSELY. And a chain of crazy incidences later, by strange circumstances, I found myself in Drama Ministry.

And just when I thought Drama Ministry was all I'd be doing, and maybe join TV as a weekly ministry during the DM 'sabbath' period, I found myself an opportunity to serve Choir! I had actually foregone Choir in my mind, with the logical mindset thinking that it'd be impossible with my other plans.

What are the odds?? It's only possible through God's supernatural arrangement! I already know deep in me that the time for me to serve TV will come when it comes, sooner or later. :)

So tired and exhausted at times, but I'm happy. Somehow things will work out..it always does.